Sunday, October 14, 2012

God who cares for those i love

my thoughts to a friend~ your tears~ it sounds like you have become very attached to my dad. i only wish you could have really known him. he has had a more than extraordinary life and when everything lines up, dad is more than ready to join my mom and sister. i often find myself smiling as i remember things throughout my lifetime with my dad. as well, i find myself in tears wondering how i will live without him so hugely present in my life. we had a remarkable bond. it was one that needed no words and yet everything was acceptable. we shared a love of fishing, as did many of my family members, the outdoors, nature~ water, the ocean, quiet times and lots of laughter and fun. dad is a very complex man and comes with life experiences that have made him feel full and complete. he and mom adored each other. i've had some difficulties with how he treats people at times. i keep thinking that is mine to deal with even tho' i don't like it~ we are imperfect. God loves us anyway and accepts our shortcomings. don't be sad. life has a beginning and an end...this is how it is to be. i will deeply miss my dad, and i know i will struggle mightily for a time, but i cannot deny him the gift that will be his, everlasting life, and my dear Mom. be joyful. have great faith. God knows exactly what he's doing. love you, cynthia

Friday, October 12, 2012

God who cares for those I love~

Hi Dad, I am missing our nightly phone calls a lot :( For nearly 4 years we spoke before bed each night. It started as a safety checkin for you and continued. I looked forward to it each day. I hope you become stronger each day Dad~ I pray that what you want, will happen. I believe that God cares for us in ways we cannot care for ourselves, and I trust him. I know you do to. Sweet dreams Papa, sweet, sweet dreams. I love you so much. Your Pooh~ ps~ I put my garden to sleep for the winter today and couldn't help but wonder if you will see in in the spring time Dad. I am thinking perhaps not~ I have no wishes for myself, but I have one for you, and that is that you know you are so loved and at peace.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

God who cares for those I love~

A very Happy 84th Birthday to you Dad~ I know you are not at home right now, and are working hard to get better. It was wonderful to share dinner with you tonight~ I love you more than words and I thank you for being my Daddy. Here's to happy and healthy year, wherever you may be~ I love you, Pooh

Tuesday, October 2, 2012

God who cares for those I love~

Dad, your goodnight call tonight brought more insight into beginnings and endings when you shared your thoughts about not driving anymore, asking me if I thought that was okay. I know how much thought went into that decision for you, as I know how you value your freedom, and getting out for some "fresh air", often driving around just to see what's going on. I am in awe and proud of you. What a wise man you are. And, of course you mentioned the safety of others. Always, others. And yet, I am afraid, you were so quiet. Scottie was concerned when he spoke to you too. I'm sure that is a lot to contemplate and such a big change for you too. I'm sorry Dad.. Is it time to say good~bye? You said you were okay, that you would tell me if you needed me, you promised. Sweetest of dreams Papa. I'm proud of you and I love you, Pooh